I went to the ultrasound so sure of your gender. I was dead set that I knew what you were and for some reason couldn’t take that out of my mind – you hear so many pregnant woman saying ‘I knew it since the beginning’ as though they’ve felt it. I kinda believed on that because I too felt I knew, only to be proved wrong!
So here you are, my little…GIRL!
It was quite a surprise when the doctor double checked 1000 times from every angle possible and I could see that you were a girl. It’s so crazy how something so little can impact us so much. I had to rewind everything that I’d ever thought about you and start thinking about the future again.
When you are pregnant, it’s inevitable to think about those things: how you’re going to look like, your personality, your smile, the way you will deal with life and your footprint in the world. It was a shock but I am completely in love with having a little girl.
Even though I though you were a boy, I had things saved on my phone that I would buy ‘just in case it’s a girl’ and believe me, I’ve been choosing them one by one now.
We’re a bit on a tight budget. Trying to get a house and having to save for plane tickets to see our families has taken it’s toll on us but I’m trying to balance and buy little things that I would love to dress you with. Even though I’m more of a ‘neutral’ kind of person, I love bows and flowers and I have been planning your nursery theme around that.
Your name has also been a surprise for me. Daddy and I were set on a boy’s name but had no girls name by the time we did the ultrasound and it took us quite a good time after that to decide. I loved your name when I read a book written by Jostein Gaarder when I was around 14 (big hint on the name for people who have read Jostein’s books) and after that I always said I wanted a baby with that name. years passed and I kinda forgot about it. When I brought it up and your dad said he really liked that name, I looked at my 14-year-old self and winked. Maybe it was meant to be. It’s a very strong name that I hope you ‘wear’ it proudly. It’s beautiful, delicate and meaningful.
Thank you for coming as a lovely surprise and for surprising us once again by being a girl. I feel that you are going to surprise us in every step of your life and we are going to be right here to watch it all.
We love you little S. and we can’t wait to meet you in 4 months.